Finish the sentence for me… “If momma ain’t happy, _____________”. That’s right, “ain’t nobody happy!”. While this may be mostly funny, we all know that being a mom is serious work and it isn’t always easy.
Just being a mom, in general, is hard work. But then add the stresses and demands of being a business owner or entrepreneur along with it and life can get downright tough for everyone.
I am not a mom. But I was born to an awesome one, have an incredible mom-in-law, and I am married and communicate every day with the best mom I know. I have seen firsthand the pressure there is to be one and to do so many things:
- Take care of kids
- Keep up with household chores
- Plan meals and grocery shop (my wife hates grocery shopping!)
- Be a great wife
- Clean up after the kids
- Be a 24 hour chaueffer
That’s just to name a few! On top of that, the pressure is there to do it with a smile. To be happy the whole time.
While this may be unrealistic, there are some things that you can do to help you reach your goal of being a happier mom at home.
Here are 7 ways:
1. Say Thank You
While you may be sleep-deprived and lacking rest at times, it is important to find a way to start your day with a few minutes to yourself. The idea of setting your alarm 20 minutes earlier than you already do may sound painful right now, but it can make all the difference in your day. Set your alarm and then say a ‘thank you’ prayer. Find one person or situation you can say thank you to God for and start your day with a positive and upbeat prayer or thought. Let it be the very first thing you do before you move into the mess.
2. Set Your Mind
Your prayer or meditation time may only be a quick minute or it can last for several. Either way, you have already set your alarm for 20 minutes earlier than the kids are up so that you can get your mind and heart set for the day. Use the rest of this time to do your daily devotions, read an inspiring blog (like this one!), or put on your headphones and listen to an inspirational message or speaker. (I mention a few of my favorites in my About page.) Whatever you do, set your mind and thoughts in an uplifting and positive direction.
3. Create Boundaries
This is hard for moms who feel that it is their duty to do everything for everyone! But there has to be space for you to breathe. I know one mom who has a son who is almost in high school but she still is making his lunch and setting out his clothes. This isn’t healthy for either person. If this is you, understand that there needs to be accountability, both for you to not limit other family member’s growth or responsibilities, and for the people who need to learn to do their part to make the home function as it should.
4. Learn to Say No
Most moms have a default setting of “yes”. This is both a blessing and a curse. For many moms, the stress that causes an unhappiness in them and in their home comes from their own doing (at least in part) because they have overcommitted and eventually feel overwhelmed. Protect your heart and your home by learning to prioritize and learning to say ‘no’ more often.
5. Do Something Physical
I didn’t say “exercise” because some moms may say, “I don’t have time for that!”. But the truth of the matter is that it could be as simple as taking 10 minutes to simply stretch. Use a foam roller. Or take a walk around the house. It doesn’t matter. Start with what you can do. No matter what you do, just move. Do something to get your blood flowing. All of this will contribute to a happier, more energetic, and focused mom.
6. Start a Gratitude Journal
Nothing helps keep you grounded as well as a gratitude journal. My wife and I started one and do it still to this day. At one point during the day (I do mine early in the day before I get too far into my day), simply pull out your journal and jot down something that you are thankful for. You will be amazed at how simple this is and, yet, how powerful it is as well.
7. Be Easy On Yourself
Many times, moms feel the pressure internally because they want to be great. But with this comes a lot of negative self-talk and criticism for not being able to be super-human. Recognize this tendency in yourself and fight against it. Know that you are doing the best you can and go easy on yourself. Being a great mom is not about being a perfect mom.
*A note to Men:
Your wife, mom, or any other woman in your life feels a pressure to perform and be the best. Understand that she is trying to make your life and home better. Let her know thatyou notice. Show her you care and appreciate the effort. Ask her where you can step in and help. This will go a long way with her and can be the best thing you can do to help your home to be a happier place for everyone. If momma’s happy, most likely you will be happier too!
What is the best thing that you do as a mom to help you stay focused, centered, and happy? Please comment and share below.